A.salam ,selamat pagi,tgh,petang dan mlm to all pembaca dan peminat budiman, Semuga hari ini lebih berkat dari smlm, its my sincere doa di hari dan bulan baik kita semua berhati dan niat bersih.Its 5.36 pagi di las vegas baru lepas bersahur, we all makan cerios jer for sahur,its hard bila dah biasa tak makan pagi, nak bersahur ni, si esah and Piah yg kejut kan kita org.Masa jv sekolah menengah dulu, arwah abah selalu yg kejut kan kita org bangun pagi sahur, and I think my late father was a malay version of my mualaf, He was a kind and gentle man, tak pernah dengo arwah abah meninggikan suara,always encouraged anak2 suruh sekolah pandai2 not main2.but because he was hardly around,i wasn't motivated enough to do well.I did not take the opportunity yg parents bagi to do well in school,infact I used it as a play ground, a place to be playfull,sebab tu I never blame my parent or anybody for my failure not to do well in my SPM,bila hidup tak terkapor2 ,struggling kat KL baru realized how important is academic qualification.Its a ticket for us to get to a better place in carear, whether we want to use it or not, is another thing, but at least we have when we need it.tak semua org bernasib baik to ubah nasib mcm jv, some just don't have the personality or ability to overcome the insults and the atitude that people around us gives.One thing I notice, coming from a poverty background,poor people see poverty as a way of life,not a problem,that is why they are okay with it. If i did not migrate from kg to a bigger city, my life would still be the same continuing another generation of poverty,because of my guts to change my future,I was able to change my two sisters future, The very least when then came to KL ubah nasib, dia org tak payah bersusah payah mcm jv lagi, the very least dia org ada tempat mengadu and tempat tinggal to start with.Every help is important walau sekechik mana pun pertolongan tu.
Bila jv dapat surat yg gaji jv akak dipotong 30rm, jadi 120 rm, jv ambik keputusan berhenti serta merta,jv tak nak stuck kat office making 120 sebulan and not able to pay expensess. By berhenti, at least jv bole fokus nak cari keja full time, without any skill, it was a long struggle to find a decent office job, By then my englis has improved tremendously.Through malay mail ad, i got the advertising job.training 2 weeks, evethough I was ready within a day, but they won't let me,because they think they really need to prepare me. they have 4 supervisor in that department, and 5 marketing like me, the supervisor sorng jantan melayu,cakap beso,berlagak, was there because of political conection,one indian and 2 chinese,all of them got paid 1500 monthly,and the marketing ad like us got paid on commisiion,and yet we were required to clock in and out. 3 of us quit after 2 weeks, I stayed and worked my butt of calling evrybody I can think of from yellow pages,and news paper, every developer I can think of. Having worked at QS help me a bit with some leads with developer.A few big developer were frenly and helpful.UDA was very kind and helpfull ordered centrespread for 2 circulation,dapat ler 600 rm each time. Lobbied for PKNS for 4 months,the director tu juling and jongang,very frenly, pegi office almost everyday for 4 months,,very promising tapi tak juga bagi order.Satu hari tu dia suruh jv jumpa dia kat Wisma YMCA kat jalan seputih on Saturday, I was so excited sebab ingat nak sign contract,dlm hati kata "Finally"Sempat pesan lagi,sampai sana,tanya receptinist,they will tell me where to go. Satu mlm jv tak makan, sebab ingat dia nak belanja makan,by then my wieght was around 90lbs, because walked almost everyday,tak makan,almost everyday makan roti ngn air kosong,so i was so looking forward to his belanja lunch sebab dia nak jumpa lunch time.He was a Directo of Co operate Affairs at that time.. Bila sampai bangunan tu, the recepnist suruh jv naik tingkat 7, kalau tak salah, jv ingat office building, rupanya hotel kat atas YMCA tu,bila jv ketuk pintu bilik tu mamat tu berlengging tak ber baju and just pakai tuala kechik tutp pinggang dia.Tersentak ler juga sekejap , then I saw pinggan me kosong, I was so sad and dispointed and asked him? "You have eaten your lunch?toya jer mamat to jawab "yes' and I asked him back and" you want to have sex with me without buying me lunch?An I assumed you are not here to sign the contract?He said "No,the contract I will sign in my office, right now lets take care of business 1st!
I told him,"No you take care of you business, my business is to get advertisers, then I walked out of that room.
I was so sad and crying all the way home,walked from jln Seputih to Keramat, Jlan yg paling jauh jv rasa dlm hidup jv sambil nangis,I was so hungry and sad,that was the time i wish i had degree, all i want was just a a decent lunch at that time,but that does not stop me from keep on trying In 2002 I was invited by MARTRADE New York to attend sales seminar in Atlanta. Masa kat situ I saw a few high ranking PKNS officer as delegates from KL.A few of them jv kenal ,because they all selalu lepak kat office that guy, they don't remember me,but I remember them very well.So I asked about that guy.they gave me his cell phone no,I called him from Delaware.Guess what, he remember my voice,and start lecturing me about agama,pasal sembayang and the rest,I have waited so long to tell him,what i have been wanting to tell, but i was so mad of my stupidity,never have the guts till i forgot.Then I told him on the phone"No2 you do not have the rights to lecture me pasal agama,you do not have the rights to tell me anything after what you are trying to do to me without feeding me, you jerk and bastard,you can go to hell,I wish karma will get to you for being hipokirts and selfish,if only you knew your help would change my life at that time.And this jerk has the guts to claim credit,that becaouse of him, I was succesfull.MasyAllah,I was just to speechless and carut kan dia before I hang up on him. When I told a few good frens about him, they all asked me the same question.'Would I have sex with him at that time?My answer was always"I do not know because I was just so looking forward to have decent meal at that time,was hoping and praying that he belanja me makan,for me to makan puas2,when i saw a fresh empty plate in his room,my heart just stop,i was so dispointed,I thought the very least if you want to have sex with some stranger, don you think you should feed them 1st?What a jerk!! So call muslim and melayu man!
Then I call my ex boss good fren, a prominent chinese arkitek,an old guy,in his 70s I think, His name was Lim Chin Sze.Ingat lagi nama org tua tu, selalu dtg office,and very frenly. He agreed to see me at Equitorial Hotel for breakfast.Bahgia rasa dapat makan breakfast,something I have not had for years! kat hotel lagi,seronok rasa,as usual I skip roti the day before.Was there sharp at 8 am, he was there already waiting for me with his big wrinkly face,diri pun dan mengigil.I ate breakfast masa tu mcm nobody business, org tua tu perhati kan jer, but i don care. after habis makan, sedawa and kentut berkali2 ler juga, perut jv pun terkejut gamaknya sebab tak pernah di isi sebanyak tu sebelum ni,org tu a tu pegang tangan jv and told me that he has a room upstairs.Innocently I asked him,'your office upstairs?bukan ker your office kat jln ampang?He giggles and said'No laa, is hotel room!! I said Oh" why?he said " he said if you want we can lepak2 atas katil! This time I came prepared.'I told him nicely,afterall I am gratefull to him for feeding me a very good meals, let me eat whatever I want. I asked him"Are you willing to convert and marry me?He said 'No laa, I am too old already to convert and marry you, and I am already married !! what am going to tell my wife? I told him"Tell your wife you are one itchy old man want to have sex with a young malay girl, because you belanja her breakfast! Tell her the truth, I am very sure, she will be so glad to give permission,but you have to transfer 1/2 of your money and asset to me before that.Terbatuk org tua tu kat meja makan tu, nasib baik tak tercekik and mampos atas meja tu!
Then I called a Southern Finance Gm.an Indian muslim, agree to see me after office hour and took me out for a movie,Laa, mcmana nak buat presentation kalau pegi tgk wayang,But ikut kan ler desprate punya pasal, masuk jer panggung wayang, mamat tu dah lain mcm jer gatal dia, yg tu jv tak tunggu lama, cepat2 jv cabut lari, tak cakap apa dah, lantak ko ler keling, pi mampos ler ko DIY kat panggung yg gelap gelita tu.Then jv jumpa the head of PR Kumpulan perangsang Selangor,lupa namanya, very nice gentleman, jv jumpa dia, buat presentation, for 1 hour, he was so impressed with me, and recomended me a job with an advertising com. Leo Burnet Advertsisng, masa tu dia masih baru lagi, punya baik nya mamat tu, jemput jv dari rumah and drove me to subang to meet the CEO,David Teo kalau tk salah jv nama CEO tu, He offered me a job immediately, and I asked him,the job specification. Dia kata prepare a speech for our beloved Dr Mhathir, the prime Minister! terbeliak mata binti ternganga mulut jv.For once jv rasa org ada confidance and faith in me, too much and too high, and takut jv dengo nya,politely jv tolak sebab tak nak memalukan diri sendiri and the gentlemen yg rekomen jv.That gentlemen gave me so much confidence in me,that after that meeting I feel i can do anything, nothing will put me down anything after that.He fed me and drove me home. Felt so good of myself after that. I wish I remember his nama, it was just one meeting but that meeting change my life, in a way I can not see.My life continue to be hard and dificult after that,nothing funny and happy for a few years .OK laa, its enough for today's celoteh, nak kena jirus pokok, kemas rumah, gi kedai cina and kedai halal hari ni. till then, take care and be kind frens!!! celoteh Joyah!